There is a widely held misconception about maturity that I would like to examine with you. The two phases of maturity occur at different points in our lives, and you will discover that, as we “mature”, we tend to overlook important aspects of true maturity.
There are two aspects to maturity. The first we learn very early in our lives, and it relates to us learning how to take care of ourselves. We learn how to brush our teeth, tie our shoes, make our beds, and keep our room tidy. So, the first phase of maturity involves learning how to take care of oneself. Unfortunately, what we learn in phase one seems to fade over time as we begin to think that maturity occurs only when we think of others.
The second phase of maturity happens when we step outside of ourselves and begin to think of the welfare of others. By the time we reach adulthood, we cultivate the idea that “caring for others” and “acting unselfishly” is what maturity is all about. As we grow older, the first phase of maturity is ignored, pushed aside, and thought of as being selfish. We are no longer acting appropriately when thinking of ourselves, as the lessons learned in childhood seem to fade.
Both phases of maturity are important!
People who are seemingly very mature are great at caring for other people but are not good at caring for their self, which will lead to problems in personal relationships such as exhaustion, disrespect, and stress. They often feel that they have “to many irons in the fire”. I would like to encourage you to revisit your feelings about maturity and learn to view maturity as an attribute that contains two critical areas of equal importance, caring responsibly for oneself and giving appropriate care to others. After all, who is going to take care of you? Is it somebody else’s job, or is it your job? Learn to take good care of yourself and become truly mature.
